I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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