He kissed a someone with a penis
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
