I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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