at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
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