i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
