ya dads aren't the best wingmen
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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