We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
