omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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