hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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