Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
