Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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