Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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