at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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