I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
