In America we eat man semen.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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