yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
