if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
why do cheetos always look like penises
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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