After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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