whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
