I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
