Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
