it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
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