playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
