It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
