I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
