is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize
