Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
