What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Randomize
