it wasn't lemon gatorade
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
