I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
