Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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