Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
