Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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