So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
