Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(323): View more from California

my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.

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(727): View more from Florida

i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.

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(904): View more from Florida

I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.

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(775): View more from Nevada

He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits

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(604): View more from British Columbia

Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...

(778): View more from British Columbia

I hate you.

(604): View more from British Columbia

You LOVE me.

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