Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize