We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
