So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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