Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
