i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
We had sex on a dog bed..
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize