well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Randomize
