Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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