um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Randomize
