I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
