I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
North Korea, Best Korea!
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
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