cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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