I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I need a beard to bite.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
