so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
