It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
It's not a walk of shame if you run
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize