So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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