The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Randomize
